Random observations from my first real week in America:
- The latest technology is designed to make me covetous of what I don’t have.
- I’m feeling lonelier than I expected.
- I think I’m inventing excuses to run to the store that have little to do with consumer needs. My hunch is … I just want to be around people.
- Church seems big and lacking the intimacy of a handful of believers circled-up in Sarajevo.
- My legs feel all rubbery when it comes to actually walking out the Kingdom here in the U.S. I’m big on words, and clueless about where to begin.
- I want to retreat into whatever comfort I can find.
“As for me, I am poor and needy, (the Message says ‘I am a mess’), but the Lord is thinking of me right now.” Psalm 40:17 Hallelujah!
Dispatches from the Shadowlands 
Personally, I think technology that can make us covetous dates back to the invention of the printing press, if not earlier. It’s why I had to stop subscribing to travel magazines!
The transition from community to solitude is a tough one. Press into God — and keep going to the store. It’s a completely legitimate way of dealing with the problem. Of course, you might also want to find out if there are any organizations nearby that you can link up with where you’d have folks to talk with — even if they aren’t Christians. Based on your writing, I’m betting you’d qualify for Mensa, if there’s a group nearby.
And take some vitamins — B-complex and C in particular — because some of what you’re feeling is just readjustment stress. Studies have shown that moving after ten years in one place carries a stress load comparable to going through a divorce or being sentenced to jail! Do not underestimate how much of what you’re feeling is just “re-entry” stress. A little DMAE might help, too — scavenges the cortisol produced by stress. So give yourself time — and a little TLC.
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Thanks for the encouragement, Waltzing. It’s good news to hear that I’m still falling into the category of normality.
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